Saturday, December 31, 2011

The burning ghats

After breakfast, I thought to myself, "What should I do today? I guess I'll go watch the dead bodies being burned at the river." This line of thought is only possible in the context of Varanasi, India.

it begins with a funeral procession of the body to the Ganges river for a final bath in the sacred water (this sacred water is full of shit, piss, trash and industrial discharge). There is, literally, a line of dead bodies waiting to be burned at the ghats (ghat = riverside stairways). There are dozens of funeral pyres but since it takes a while for a body to completely burn, there is a queue.

There are men who tend the cremation fires, they are called "doms". They lay the fire wood down and then the family sets the deceased wrapped in white linen on top, a family member is given a burning brand to light the pyre.

you can tell how rich the deceased was by how many layers of colorful wrappings his corpse was wrapped in for the funeral procession and how much wood there is on the funeral pyre (the wood is sold by weight). sometimes the family will throw incense powder and other offerings on top of the body.

I watched a dead Indian man's tan face turn black, then shiny and glossy like a melted doll head as the fire slowly crept up, then charred black like charcoal, and then white as the skull was finally exposed.

Is there something beautiful about a burning corpse? the ragged outline of a charring body silhouetted against the orange and red flames...is it elegant? I don't know.

as the body burns down to the torso, the doms will take a long bamboo pole, bring it up to the 12 o'clock position and then whack the corpse. This is done to break up the torso, ribs and skull so it burns quicker.

Feet are a problem. they often stick out of the fire. A couple of times i watched an unsinged foot, with its charred shin bones sticking out, fall out of the fire and have to be shoved back into the pit by the doms.

i didn't see anybody crying, there were some sniffling and red eyes, but that could have been from the smoke and heat. there were no women there.

Watching the endless procession of bodies burn, i was waiting for some kind of epiphany insight, something. but nothing came. well, nothing original at least. I found the usual pessimistic and optimistic clicheisms about life to be completely unsatisfying. Yet i was unable to come up with my own witty and pithy insight. I am not a clever soul.

The kites! The answers are in the kites! I just have to figure out the kites.

Oh, what our lives are worth.

no pictures because cameras are not allowed at the burning ghat. foreigners with camera are met with hostility and lectures.

I love Paulo Coehlo novels, they are written for travel. But watching bodies burn and reading paulo coelho novels in India is a recipe for trouble. Add to that, the visit I made to the site of the buddha's first sermon and I am overwhelmed by volatile emotions and thoughts. poverty, life, death, karma, wealth, desire, health, meaning, happiness, sadness...what is all this?

so it goes.



On the lighter side of things: yesterday, I took my first real hot shower in two weeks and here is a picture of a (admittedly sad looking) puppy:



Thursday, December 29, 2011

Saturday, December 24, 2011

Friday, December 23, 2011

Recap: Jaisalmer

- I haven't looked in a mirror for six days now. there are no mirrors in the desert, nor in my hotel. A sneaky Indian could have drawn a giant penis on my forehead while I slept and I wouldn't know.

- I have showered only once in Jaisalmer.

- During the beginning of my trip, I feared I wouldn't be able to get away from India while I was in India, but I was wrong. I was able to get away from the crowd and noise, thank god I was able to get away.

- Back home, I may find a hair in my food once a year. Here in India, I find hairs a few times a week. I guess it makes sense that I'd find hair in my food here, it plays into the whole "dirty and unclean" reputation this country has (and rightly deserves), but I suspect they do it on purpose. It must be a willful thing because it's just not possible for that much hair to end up in food on accident. For all the years I've cooked at home and worked at a restaurant, I have never had hair fall into the food unnoticed (yes, I know).

- A good day now is a day with firm regular bowel movement. If I see or do anything interesting on top of that, that makes it a great day. Life is simple when you travel.






Jaisalmer: day six?


I've been sending out a postcard from every city I've visited. I am hopeful they'll make it to America but sometimes I think I'm just wasting my rupees.


I was watching the sun set over this dusty desert town when a group of young beggar girls came and tried to sell me cheap bracelets. I wasn't going to buy any, but I eventually gave in and decided to see what I could get for 50 rupees. Apparently 50 rupees gets you one incredibly cheap and flimsy, but shiny, bracelet. I didn't even haggle the price, I just decided I was willing to give them 50 Rs as charity, so I bought it at asking price.

I haven't been able to figure out this particular class of people. I think they are some sort of "untouchables" but I'm not sure. They are definitely on the lower end of the caste system though. Because despite their always colorful and distinctive dress, they are always poor, dirty and begging or hustling souvenirs. But the younger women and girls often having striking and beautiful features. Of course, the life they were born into is not a gentle one and all the older women look worn out and tired of life.

In the desert...

...the air is dry and dusty. The sun hurts my skin, but underneath a tree my body will shiver. My lips are hard and cracked. My brow is furrowed from the glare. At night, a cacophony of stars and cold silence, more stars than I ever expected and I expected a lot.

In the desert discontent seems frivolous. Or maybe just far away.

In the desert, I realized I needed to formulate a question before I can look for an answer.

In the desert I read, "If you can't find enlightenment in a situation, at least get some fun out of it".

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Camel safari

The camel safari guides cooking us dinner.


Can you tell the difference between a sunset and a sunrise?



morning in the desert.

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

In the desert...

it can get cold.

One day I will find a hotel that follows through on their promise of hot showers. One day, but not today.

A perfect summary of my life: Tom Waits


The Desert





It never ceases to amaze me when I end up where I am going. When I feel lost and unsure of where I am or how to get to my destination, it always suddenly appears. one way or another, i always get there.

Monday, December 19, 2011

Cold showers that shock and electrocute. Now I know i am traveling.



This is a bhang cookie. Let's just say I should have been more patient and not eaten the whole thing in less than an hour.



Safari Me.

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Jaisalmer: "We were somewhere on the edge of the desert..."

I turned a corner in Jodphur. I began to see the India I expected when I got lost in the back alleys of that blue city. I received more acts of kindness and welcome in one day there than I did in weeks in dharamsala and delhi.

Now I am in Jaisalmer and I think I am where I need to be. Bhang shops, motorcycle rentals and camel safaris are all possibilities here.





Saturday, December 17, 2011

jodphur thoughts and such

- Today I saw a man cleaning garbage off the streets and alleyways by scooping it with a metal bowl. His shirt read, "being human". He sure was being human. speaking of being human, let's talk about poverty and the meaning of life for a moment. On a planet with 7 billion people, about half of them live chest deep in flithy poverty, another billion live in regular poverty, another billion in their respective country's definition of "middle class", then about a billion and a half are considered upperclass &/or live in western countries with high standards of living. out of those billions of people, only 1.3 million have the heavenly luxury of living in Hawaii. that is .0001% of the people on the planet. you'd sooner win the lottery than end up in hawaii. the more I travel the more I appreciate hawaii, home is something special. So, why am I here?

- on a similar note, I now can't help but condone the US foreign policy that protects our way of life. Highways, strip malls, flushing toilets, the EPA, the FDA, government regulations, refrigeration, birth control, etc... God bless the united states...?

- If you have traveler's diarrhea and you need to take a piss, make sure you sit down when you relax your muscles to pee. trust me on this.

- India. I don't know. it's hard to trust a country that makes you sick twice in two weeks.

- I am lost and confused.

Thursday, December 15, 2011


No more street food.

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Udaipur




I feel like I am traveling again.

Haggling

There is nothing I hate more than haggling. I'm too soft spoken and thin skinned to be good at it, but at the same time I feel compelled to use every trick in the book to deprive these poor local merchants of my gringo dollars.

Haggling is such a crazy activity, it's incredibly complex if you think about it. The basic context of two human beings with conflicting motivations of desire and greed for monetary and material wealth is difficult enough.

But then throw in the tricks and strategy of haggling and you have an incredibly intense game of wits.

as a foreign buyer you have to best-guess what the appropriate price is for a product, and the same product can be priced entirely differently based on the region, the shop owner, and even which street you happen to be on at the time. You have to wonder if the merchant is really not making money when he doesn't go lower or if he's just playing hardball or refusing to sell low. You have to consider the fact you are a rich foreigner and it wouldn't kill you to give him an extra one or two dollar in price, but at the same time, it's a matter of principle that you don't let yourself get boned. then there's the quality of the goods to consider,...etc...i could go on and on.

the strategies for haggling are numerous as well, straight take it or leave it offer (but you have to be willing to walk away), the solicitation of bids from different vendors, the ability to walk away, buying more than one item for a discount, etc... i could go on.

Supposedly, foreigners pay less than they would back home, the merchants make money and everyone is happy. But for me, I always wonder...what if I could have gotten it for less? what if...?

nope, don't like haggling.

Saturday, December 10, 2011

How do you keep your mind off things that are bothering you?

I travel around the world. It's a little extreme and expensive, but it works.

Update: To His Noodliness

I guess what i was trying to communicate in the previous post was how traumatizing and demoralizing that bout with food poisoning was. I can deal with acute stomach pain (the sharp stabbing kind), but the vague dis-ease and enveloping malaise I experienced took a heavy mental and emotional toll. It was as psychically draining as it was physically draining. Despite the fact I expected to get sick in India, I wasn't prepared for the adverse effects upon my psyche.

Thursday, December 8, 2011

To His Noodliness

When your entire world gets reduced to one toilet and bottles of water, everything else loses meaning. Himalayan mountains, Starbuck frappucino's, Mercedes Benz's, Facebook, houses with white picket fences...these things don't mean much when all you desire and all you need is a western-style toilet and toilet paper.

And I've never been more grateful to Vishnu/Buddha/The Flying Spaghetti Monster for anything than for the blessing of having access to a western toilet these past few days.

Let us all take a moment and bow our heads to our respective gods and give thanks for good health, regular bowel movements and firm stool. Because it's these little blessings you take for granted and don't appreciate until it's not there.

Forgive me if I sound irreverent and a little flippant, but my gratuity is sincere and humble.



Ramen

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Recap: Dharamsala


Dharamsala is interesting in the sense of life in a spiritual community. there are monks everywhere, mantras and "om mani padme hung" mantras being played on stereo's, lots of people walking around with prayer beads. Pictures of buddha's and the dalai lama are everywhere. There are lots of classes and lectures here on buddhist philosophy, meditation, yoga, tibetan cultural arts, meditation retreats etc... it's interesting because everything is a constant reminder for you to practice.

having said that, dharamsala is a bit more dirty and grittier than i expected. I was hoping it'd be different from the rest of india but it's still pretty dirty and noisy and crowded. however the people here are much nicer than the rest of india.

And although it is a buddhist community, there is a definite sense of westernization. There is a new-age hippy vibe to this place. There are so many westerners walking around dressed in local shawls and jewelry, carrying around prayer beads...It's hard to take them seriously.

But I can see the benefits to living in a spiritually oriented community, everything and everyone is on the same page as you.

Also, it is very cold up here.




This is the dog I befriended. I call him "Slice" for the pizza slices I fed him to win him over. I like him because he's a very bashful dog. He has a really funny way of holding his head down (you can see it in the picture), and he won't really look you in the eye even though he's happy to see you. I like him because he's been guarding the door to my room every night, his presence oddly makes me feel a little safer.

Delhi Belly

Six days, I made it six days. It started off with simple diarrhea. The pain wasn't even bad, I thought I got off easy as I went to bed that night. Then the fever, body aches and general sense of malaise set in. This wasn't just a case of travelers diarrhea, this was straight up food poisoning.

Luckily, it ran it's course over the night and by morning I felt less sick. I spent the whole day in bed to give myself time to recover and because I still felt pretty wasted.

edit: Travler's Diarrhea has a mean recovery time of 3.6 days.

Sunday, December 4, 2011

Bucket List:

item #27: See His Holiness the Dalai Lama. check




Thursday, December 1, 2011

Day three?

Everything coming out of my nose is either red or black, blood or pollution.

I wanted to leave New Delhi two days ago, but I have to stick around to see the Dalai Lama speak tomorrow.

I do not like this city. not at all.

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Day Two


One way ticket to India: $817
Auto Rickshaw, Paharganj to IHC: 80 Rupees
Delicious chai from cart vendor: 12 Rupees
Ten pills of Diazepam for 17 Rupees: priceless

But seriously, I'm over it. Ready to move on now. Delhi is noisy, polluted and crowded. I Need fresh air and space. And streets where i don't need to work so hard to stay alive.

India: Day One

The Paharganj area I am staying in right now. Full of dreadlocked hippies and old European women. I took one bite of the thali below and knew I was home.


The noise, the smell, the crowds, the traffic I aint ever seen before, the food....

Love it.

I ain't leaving this place.

Saturday, November 26, 2011

Recap: The Eigth Wonder of the World:California

Endless suburbia. Box stores, freeways, mountains, radio, wind.
The American Dream and Babies
GPS
Family
America

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

some travel songs, not all, some

India T-Minus 1 day

Okay, upon further research I realized that big chunks of my itinerary are in some cold ass places. I'm talking sub-freezing. I knew the Himalayas would be cold, but for some reason I didn't think it would be that cold. I was a little daunted at first, but upon further consideration, the idea of me freezing my ass off in a Himalayan village, neck deep in snow in the Kashmir Valley, and drinking chai on a snowy cafe veranda fills me with optimism and joy.

Monday, November 21, 2011

Sunday, November 20, 2011

The hardest part of a 1,000 kilometer journey is taking the first step

Sitting here in the comfort of my own home, I am vacillating between confident eagerness to start a new backpacking adventure and debilitating fear about starting this new backpacking adventure. It's the strangest feeling in the world, one that I remember vividly (see June 9, 2010 post) from the start of my CA trip.

PROS:
-On the one hand, I really want to go. I have lots of experience and confidence from my Central American trip so I know I can do this.

-I know I'm going to have a good time, I know I probably won't die, get robbed, get raped or have my organs harvested.

-?????

-And I really need to get away from Hawaii.


CONS:
-But on the other hand, there are lots of things that are quite terrifying and make me think twice about what I'm doing. For one thing, the language barrier is going to be worse than in CA because of the different languages of the countries I'm going to. Unlike Latin American, I can't travel through many countries with just one language, and I sure as hell am not going to bother learning Thai, Hindi, Vietnamese and Nepali.

-And India is kind of the big question mark. It's something I'm looking forward to, and many people I've met said that it's a love or hate kind of destination. I am cautiously optimistic that I'll like it, but...India is dirty and poor, man.

-And squat toilets. Jesus, don't even get me started on the squat toilets.

-Then there's the money issue. Do I really want to spend thousands and thousands of dollars I can't really afford? What really kills me is paying rent on an empty house again.

-And let me tell you what is going to happen when I finally return home. I'm going to start working in the restaurant again and instead of going back to school or finding a real job (like I said I was going to do last time), I'm going to end up working there for another year, spending every minute hating the business and myself . Then, when next summer rolls around I'm going to tell myself "one more backpacking trip and that's it. I'm going to get a real job after I come back." Wash, rinse, repeat.


The image I have of myself stepping out of the airport into the chaos of New Delhi alone with all my earthly possessions hanging on my back, vulnerable to any thief with an inclination, is terrifying and yet so titillating and enticing...........the truth of the matter is, those are the moments I live for. Those "where the hell am I?" and "Where is food and shelter?" panic attacks are half the fun of backpacking.


CONCLUSION: I'm going. That was never in doubt, I just thought I'd try to share the weird conflicting thoughts and emotions roiling around in my head.

Monday, November 14, 2011

NOTE TO SELF: Go to Kalamazoo, MI.
Allah, please don't let NBC cancel Community. You already took Firefly from us. Mercy! Grant us the small cult comfort of weird quirky humor that is Community.

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Preparations

Getting visas, doing research, packing clothes, filling prescriptions, buying toiletries, etc... is important of course. But equally important for being prepared for this backpacking trip is watching and reading the appropriate movies and books. I'm watching movies like Fight Club, Lost in Translation, Outsourced, etc... to remind me of how weird life is. I'm reading books like Cat's Cradle, The Alchemist and Chuck Palanhiuk novels to remind myself that sometimes you have to blow off your own jaw with a double aught in order to be born again.

And of course, Shantaram. The Gregory Roberts novel that started this whole thing. If I had to give one reason as to why I'm going to India, Shantaram would be my answer. I am going to India because I read this book.

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Onwards to India

I just booked my flight to India. I'm pretty sure this is going to happen this time. I haven't been feeling very excited about this backpacking trip until now. I guess it never felt "real" to me, like I was never sure it was going to happen. But since I booked my ticket and started gathering my supplies, I am beginning to feel The Excitement. It's not only excitement I feel. It's a chaotic blend of emotions.

I am feeling:

Fear: Because I'm going to India, man!
Excitement: Because I'm going to India, man!
Hope: Maybe I'll find the meaning of life?
Pessimism: What's the point? why waste money? I need to find a job.
Optimistic: I know it's going to be an experience, one way or another
Confidence: I did central america, i should be able to do India/Nepal.
Nothing: sometimes I just feel bored.
Doubt: Do i really need to do this? What is my objective?
ennui: What is the point of doing anything?
Panic: vaccines, medicines, language, visas, so many things to do.
Dread: diarrhea, language, sickness, tiredness, diarrhea, injury, death, squat toilets, diarrhea, 15 hour train rides.
Alive!: Fuck objectives and reasons! I'm going to india, man!

conclusion: I'm a moody bastard.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Expensive Repair: 0
Me: 1

Between this and the liquor commission thing, I feel justifiable.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Every dish I cook with Russet potatoes end up as a variation of mashed potatoes. No, I'm not complaining.

Monday, October 17, 2011

Thought for Food

What is cooking? And what makes a person a "good" cook (in the sense of a home cook, not a professionally trained career chef)?

To expand on my first question, what is the difference between a factory machine assembling pieces of metal to produce a television set and a person putting food into a pot to make a stew? Is cooking the application of heat to raw food products to enable nutrient absorption by human digestives systems? Because that's how the dictionary defines it. If so, what about salads, sandwiches and sushi? Is someone who is making a salad not "cooking"? And if cooking is just the application of heat to raw food, is a person who boils a piece of beef chuck considered a "cook"? It seems like you could define cooking as a mechanical system of applying component parts and heat, but cooking is clearly more than that.


I was thinking about the second question "what makes a person a good cook?" and arrived at the conclusion that there are three main dimensions that define a good cook.

1. First of all is the Mechanics. One must properly understand the physical mechanics of food and apply consistent technique to cooking. This includes the basic fundamentals of heat and time, prioritizing processes for maximum efficiency, speed, time management, prep skills, knife skills, understanding the physical properties of protein, starches, lipids, etc... The best evidence of mastery of Mechanics, in my opinion, is the ability to assemble the final product while all the component ingredients are still hot from it's initial cooking process.

2. Then there is Synthesis. Like any other skill in the world, practice and experience is required to be good at it. With that experience comes the inherent ability to synthesize. Synthesis is the ability to take what were once mere mechanical obedience to canon (i.e. following recipes) and proceeding to create something different. Since it is impossible to have experienced every recipe in the world, the ability to amalgamate your limited personal knowledge of food and recipes to create new taste combinations is critical. Everyone has to work within limitations, and it is the ability to Synthesize and Create within and around those restrictions that makes a good cook.

3. Creativity. Cooking is still an Art. It is the ability to break free of convention and restrictions. Whether it is the restriction of time, money, a bulky recipe book, ingredients, space or energy, a good home cook must be creative. Of course, creativity doesn't only mean the artistic side of cooking, equally important is the creative use of intelligence, especially in the area of logistics. This means planning meals with leftover ingredients, shopping for ingredients that maximizes efficiency and minimizes waste and seeing the infinite varieties of meals possible within the resources at hand. Like a painter with a blank canvas, or a writer with a white page, a good cook will utilize every tool in his kitchen to create an experience of food. Like a chess-master, a good cook will see not just where each ingredient needs to go for this meal, but he or she will look days into the future and see where each piece of the food puzzle will fit.

Notice that taste and making a delicious meal is not a requirement to being a good cook. In my paradigm, it is possible to be a good cook who produces dishes with sub-par flavor. I admire the feat of mastery inherent in being a good cook. Delicious food is a desirable and often automatic outcome of that mastery, but the appreciation of tasty food is a superficial titillation of the taste buds, while the appreciation of a mastered skill satisfies something in me much deeper and profound.

huzzah.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011


Liquor Commission: 0
Me: 1

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Pork Loin Roast with delicious broccoli thing and brown rice and onion gravy.

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Sauteed chicken with mushroom sauce


I know this looks really good. But the question is, does it tastes as good as it looks? The answer is no. No, it doesn't taste as good as it looks...it tastes way better.

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Parsleyed potatoes with pan fried herbed chicken breast.

Did you know smashing chicken breast flat makes it cook evenly and quicker? I knew about this trick but never applied it until today. So, I learned something useful and practical today.

I noticed that whenever I learn or do something new, it comes with an odd little sense of regret. It's the thought, "Damn it. Where has this knowledge been all my life? Why didn't I do this earlier in my life? Or, I wish I had known this when...".

So now, I want to learn everything I can possibly learn and do everything I possibly can do, right now, so I will have the optimal ratio of useful-knowledge-and-experience-acquired to time-spent-alive.

It's a strange feeling. This drive to learn and experience life. I hope it goes away soon because it is a lot of work.

Sunday, September 25, 2011

PUNK ROCK SHOW

Note to self: THE BOUNCING SOULS! november 18th at Hawaiian Brians. PLUS, youth brigade!

Heartbreak!

I've forgotten how much it sucks and hurts when your team loses. Feels bad, man.

Saturday, September 24, 2011


steak, pepper, basil, oregano, garlic, carrots, bell peppers, onion, beef stock, corn starch, pasta, green onions.

It tastes ok. A little bland. I was hesitant to add any more salt because that one can of beef broth contained a day's worth of sodium.
Before:


After:


Both pictures look exactly the same you say? That's because instead of changing out the refrigerator handle with the new assembly I bought, I ended up just adjusting the old one. It works kind of ok. It works better than before, but could probably work even better. But like I always say: good enough, by definition, is good enough.

Friday, September 23, 2011

Yesterday was a good day.

Spent all day yesterday wrenching on pipes while listening to The Smiths and Tegan & Sara.

Fixed: four water shut off valves, terminal block for GE stove and a kitchen light switch. All this in addition to last week's kitchen faucet, solar water heater panel and main water shut off valve. All this other stuff has been preparation for Next Week, when I'm gonna change the toilets.


Before:

During:After:




Before:
After:


Before:
After:


Before: After:

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Elizabeth Warren



I am not joking when I say I find this woman incredibly sexy.


I would totally tap that, tap it like a frat boy with a keg.